I’m all about everyone’s voice being heard so when I received a message from one of our readers, it gave me an idea. Anyone who wants to comment on any of the things we write about on this site or really just anything you want us to know in general, please feel free to do that. I’ll publish your thoughts even if they are in direct opposition to my own so long as they are respectful and not hostile. I will always reply and be really sweet! You can submit your ideas by using the contact form HERE. Now, enjoy these thoughts from Melissa.
RE: SUCK IT
“If ever I am asked or have the opportunity to mention it, I will claim that I am a positive person, yet I find myself being negative at times. I voice this positivity to others, but have recently started to wonder if I’m trying to convince them or myself that I am so positive. I have the inner desire for positivity, but somewhere during the filtration process my actions and words show a different side. I don’t feel guilty or shameful for feeling negative about negative things, but I am finding more and more that that is what I’m surrounded with. It’s not always things happening to me personally that bring on the darkness. I am recognizing a pattern in my life: I stay in constant company with people who are, not negative by nature, but have sad existences or “bad luck” or very unfortunate events happening regularly in their lives. I first started realizing this after I read a post on the “Bleed With Me” blog site. The post was entitled “Suck It” by Missy and referenced emotional vampires that “suck” us dry. I was so very enlightened by this information. I had never thought about things like this before! I immediately started making a mental list of all the people in my life that I classified as emotional vampires. Then I started assessing the times I had been guilty of the same vampiric assault on the emotions of my loved ones. I am happy to report I found I have become less draining as I’ve grown. I decided to let this new information marinate in my mind for a while until I knew what to do with it. It was only days later when I had my 2nd epiphany-type occurrence. I was engaged in my morning meditation session, and the narrator began talking about Mudita: sympathetic or unselfish joy, or joy in the good fortune of others. I have never been a jealous hearted person and always celebrate the joys of others’ good fortune. I actually thought to myself “Well, this doesn’t pertain to me! I guess I won’t get much out of this session.” Sidenote: whenever I get that cocky and confident in myself God always finds a way to remind me of my humanity. Well, after a few moments of explaining what mudita is, the narrator asks that I think of 1 person in my life who has recently experienced some good fortune….any kind. All I had to do was think of 1 person in my life that I could send thoughts of mudita to. I, literally, couldn’t think of anyone. At that very sad moment I realized I actually had no one in my life that had shared anything positive with me in weeks! No wonder I feel so negative! It was then that I made the conscious decision to make some overdue changes to my emotional surroundings! I have begun pulling away from toxic friendships. This may make me sound like a bad friend or that maybe I am selfish. Well, shouldn’t we all be a little selfish? How am I supposed to maintain good mental, emotional, and spiritual health(physical too if you consider how much control the spirit has over the body) without being able to say “I can no longer allow you to pull me down!” At some point in our evolution we have to learn to protect ourselves for our own survival. This is not a decision I made in haste, and I am trying to be as delicate about the process as possible, but the time has definitely come for me to make some changes! I am excited about the potential new relationships I will be able to develop now that my mind will be actively seeking the same positivity in others that I try to exercise in my own life.
I am so pleased to know that you were able to extract something positive from one of our posts. We should be selfish as it relates to our personal peace. It’s not really selfish at all but our society has a “you owe me” mentality. One of my favorite quotes: “Even after all this time the sun never says to the earth ‘you owe me’. Look at what happens with a love like that. It lights the whole sky.” -Hafiz
Realizing that we are responsible for our entire experience is a game changer. The present moment is actually created in the past via the subconscious mind. When we can take control of our thoughts we can literally choose the experiences we want to bring into our lives instead of our fears choosing for us. Keep writing. You have the gift of the gab.