Stone Cold

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I haven’t felt anything for almost 72 hours. I always feel so intensely and consistently. So it’s weird. Numbness makes me feel so naked… Well, more like something is missing than an actual emotion.. I even keep thinking I am forgetting something every time I leave the house.

Like, who am I if I am not constantly having to decipher the difference between your feelings and mine? Because I feel so deeply that I feel most of your shit too. And now: NOTHING.

In a single moment earlier this week, I felt the heartbreak of a thousand lovers all at once… and it moved straight through me, left me gasping for air. Then, it was replaced with a giant dose of IDGAF.

Welcome to the danger zone. A selfless heart just turned to Stone.

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Beautiful Dreamer

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Beautiful dreamer

Dreaming beautiful dreams

I know you’re in pain

But nothing is as it seems

You haven’t lost me

I’m always right here

In your heart

In your mind

I’m the salt in your  tears

I’ve known this was coming

The storm after the calm

But there will come a day

When our suffering becomes our psalm

…All You Are is The Moon…

 

 

It’s NOT Just “A Girl Thing”

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As the abuse of sexual power goes, females play a larger role than most people realize. Sexual coercion occurs when someone uses pressure or emotional force to get a person to agree to sex. Studies have documented that victims of sexual coercion can suffer from anxiety, depression and PTSD. It is possible to say yes and not mean yes. Below is a personal account of sexual coercion in the words of the person who was manipulated. Questions for the author can be directed to me HERE. He wishes to remain anonymous for now. 

The idea that all guys want as much sex as they can get is completely false. For as long as I can remember I have wanted my first time to be saved for someone really special. I always imagined meeting someone and being totally taken by her., delighting in the realization that our feelings matched and the fall afterword being irresistible… there being nothing we wanted more than to spend every moment together. Like we were the only two people in the world. What actually happened was not like that at all.

I met her in the apartment building I lived in. I was 22 at the time and she was 19. Although I mostly kept to myself while I lived there, I had run into her a couple of times in the first few weeks. We would talk while doing laundry and we seemed to have a lot in common. We got along really well right from the get go. I quickly came to enjoy her for her friendliness and dry humor and the crazy stories she would tell me. The more we talked, the closer we grew and before long we were hanging out in each other’s apartments and talking about our lives, listening to each other’s music and eating together.  It was a nice friendship and then things got complicated when she became physically attracted to me.

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Hissy Fits: An Emotional Blitz

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I was born and Raised in Mississippi. Mississippi is located in the Southern part of the United States commonly referred to as “The South”. We have a saying around these parts… “Here in the South we don’t hide crazy. We parade it on the front porch and give it a sweet tea.” It’s true. We stand by that.

When southern women lose control of their emotions it is called pitching a “hissy fit.” And most Southern women are real quick to correct anyone who suggests they throw a fit. We don’t throw them, we pitch them.

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Virginity

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As the abuse of sexual power goes, females play a larger role than most people realize. Sexual coercion occurs when someone uses pressure or emotional force to get a person to agree to sex. Studies have documented that victims of sexual coercion can suffer from anxiety, depression and PTSD. It is possible to say yes and not mean yes. Below is a personal account of sexual coercion in the words of the person who was manipulated:

I met her in the apartment building I lived in. I was 22 at the time and she was 19. Although I mostly kept to myself while I lived there, I had run into her a couple of times in the first few weeks. We would talk while doing laundry and we seemed to have a lot in common. We got along really well right from the get go. I quickly came to enjoy her for her friendliness and dry humor and the crazy stories she would tell me. The more we talked, the closer we grew and before long we were hanging out in each other’s apartments and talking about our lives, listening to each other’s music and eating together.  It was a nice friendship and then things got complicated when she became physically attracted to me.

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Thoughts + Emotions > Belief > Reality

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Reality Creation

Logical, scientific types call this a “deepity”.

Please feel free to take this image and use it however you like, wherever you like.

xoxo -missy