I was 4 years old the first time I fell in love. His name was Mackie and he was older. I would sit at my window and watch him throw the baseball with his Dad. My mom has told me that after some time I worked out when he would be outside and I would go to the window a few minutes before and call out to him. “Mackie, oh Mackie where are you? Mackie, I love you.” Sometimes he would look at me and wave. I experienced our “romance” from the inside looking out and he experienced it from the outside looking in.
Something I have heard so often in my life: “You’re too young to know what love is.” To that I say BULLSHIT. Love knows no age. Mackie was the most uncomplicated romance I have ever participated in.
Relationships are challenging and lately I’ve struggled to get to the core of what makes them so difficult. There are tons of relationship experts and websites that take a lot of your money to give you information about compatibility or match you with someone who is right for you and yada yada yada…
When you get to the heart of it compatibility is just a word and like so many other words we assign it a certain meaning without realizing how clinging to meanings can limit us.
My earliest childhood memory is a “paranormal” experience. Age 3. I can remember so many details about the home I lived in and the people in my life. My Mom and Dad were still married. My dad had this perfect 80’s beard going but still rocked the 70’s hair. My mom was so delicate and tiny. Like a little fairy. Like me. I remember the way all of the furniture was arranged and which door led to which room.
My mother and I were both pretty shocked by the accuracy of those details when I spontaneously recalled the memory at age 14. There were two spirits I saw during that period and I am pretty sure they were within the same 24 hour period. I can’t be certain though. Time isn’t real anyway. Doesn’t matter.
There was a lady in a white dress with long black hair that I saw standing at the foot of my bed when I woke from sleep in the middle of the night, and a shadow figure I spotted hunched over in the living room floor. His shape mimicked that of the thinker statue but he was solid black. There was low lighting in the living room. He was much darker than the surroundings. I was wide awake when I saw him.