It’s NOT Just “A Girl Thing”

Standard

19875534_1338848802818359_7815570877305545657_n

As the abuse of sexual power goes, females play a larger role than most people realize. Sexual coercion occurs when someone uses pressure or emotional force to get a person to agree to sex. Studies have documented that victims of sexual coercion can suffer from anxiety, depression and PTSD. It is possible to say yes and not mean yes. Below is a personal account of sexual coercion in the words of the person who was manipulated. Questions for the author can be directed to me HERE. He wishes to remain anonymous for now. 

The idea that all guys want as much sex as they can get is completely false. For as long as I can remember I have wanted my first time to be saved for someone really special. I always imagined meeting someone and being totally taken by her., delighting in the realization that our feelings matched and the fall afterword being irresistible… there being nothing we wanted more than to spend every moment together. Like we were the only two people in the world. What actually happened was not like that at all.

I met her in the apartment building I lived in. I was 22 at the time and she was 19. Although I mostly kept to myself while I lived there, I had run into her a couple of times in the first few weeks. We would talk while doing laundry and we seemed to have a lot in common. We got along really well right from the get go. I quickly came to enjoy her for her friendliness and dry humor and the crazy stories she would tell me. The more we talked, the closer we grew and before long we were hanging out in each other’s apartments and talking about our lives, listening to each other’s music and eating together.  It was a nice friendship and then things got complicated when she became physically attracted to me.

Continue reading

This is where it ends.

Standard

165724194

I’m stuck. I’m almost 32 years old, and I am still stuck when I try to tell the story of how my sexuality was shaped. I envy people who can freely talk about such things. It’s just not something that comes easily to me. Some days I wish I could have an open and engaging conversation about sexuality just like I can about Star Trek. God, that would make life so much easier.

For so long in my life, I thought that sex was something to be feared or ashamed of. From the first moment that I was asked not to “tell, cause then we will just get into trouble…” to this very moment, I have been one twisted, mental fuck-up when it comes to anything sexual. And that really, really sucks.

Continue reading

Virginity

Standard

18118420_1264588920244348_2473688596988696050_n

As the abuse of sexual power goes, females play a larger role than most people realize. Sexual coercion occurs when someone uses pressure or emotional force to get a person to agree to sex. Studies have documented that victims of sexual coercion can suffer from anxiety, depression and PTSD. It is possible to say yes and not mean yes. Below is a personal account of sexual coercion in the words of the person who was manipulated:

I met her in the apartment building I lived in. I was 22 at the time and she was 19. Although I mostly kept to myself while I lived there, I had run into her a couple of times in the first few weeks. We would talk while doing laundry and we seemed to have a lot in common. We got along really well right from the get go. I quickly came to enjoy her for her friendliness and dry humor and the crazy stories she would tell me. The more we talked, the closer we grew and before long we were hanging out in each other’s apartments and talking about our lives, listening to each other’s music and eating together.  It was a nice friendship and then things got complicated when she became physically attracted to me.

Continue reading